SEO Scam Artists and their Wiley Ways... A Quick Guide
While a ‘normal’ profession generally requires years of apprenticeship, competence assessment and formal qualifications, professional SEO scam artists require only a web site and some business cards.
Indeed, although formal SEO qualifications are slowly being established, these are still generally unrecognized, and not easily distinguished from their ‘Buy the Diploma’ counterparts.
Not only that, but the very techniques which many formal Optimization qualifications are based on, are either based on outdated promotional methods, or fundamentally flawed from Google’s point of view.
For the purposes of this article I will try to give you an insight into the methods employed by SEO scam artists in the shape of a short tutorial showing you how to enter the ‘profession’
The High Art of becoming an accomplished SEO Scam Artist
Stage 1 - Company Setup
Although you know nothing at all about search engine optimization, Google’s algorithms or any other aspect of web promotion, you need not let these minor details get in your way. You could learn about the subject by hanging around SEO forums, regularly checking out expert blogs, buying some in-depth literature, or even reading up on what Google has to say about SEO, but that would be too much like hard work, wouldn’t it? So instead of learning the nuts and bolts of search engine optimization, you memorise industry buzzwords like ‘SERPs’, ‘Meta Tags’, ‘SEM’, ‘PPC Advertising’ and ‘ROI’.
Get yourself a domain name (for preference one with the term SEO in it) and copy someone else’s SEO web site, making sure of course to change its appearance sufficiently so as not to be confused with your competitor. As a competent SEO scamster, do not forget to alter the contact information, but do be sure to make them sufficiently obscure by using P.O. Boxes, and unregistered cell-phone numbers! If you fail to get this right, irate customers may actually be able to find you, and you wouldn’t like that.
Now that you have a new SEO website, you have something to show prospective clients. It will never rank anywhere for any search-terms even remotely worthwhile, but this does not really matter since you can easily blag* your way around that.
Stage 2 - Become an Expert & Spread the Word
Remember, to become an expert in this industry, you need some really expensive business cards**. Once this particular hurdle has been cleared, you will need to start spreading the word about your ‘expert’ services.
Remember the SEO scam artist’s mantra:
"A fool and his money will soon be parted"
Then go and find yourself some tradeshows (real-world, not SEO) where you can sign up the first batch of clients to get your business rolling.
Trade-Shows are your prime source of new business to start with, since nobody is ever likely to find you online. Be sure to take a good, long look around the exhibition-hall, and then target some properly ignorant business owners with plenty of spare cash and no appreciable knowledge of online sales.
*Blag is an English slang word for double-talk, pulling the wool over one’s eyes, or spouting off half truths. The ability to blag is a standard job requirement for SEO Scam artists.
**to demonstrate your level of competence and your success, obviously...
